Waiting

I am a doer.

Like if I find out that there’s something to get involved in, that I’m not already involved in, my first inclination is to get involved.

It’s taken years of practice to slow my roll, and think, “Is this something God wants me to be involved in.” If not then I move on. This has taken, no kidding, probably 10 years to even get me to the point of stopping.

Then I start daily and diligently seeking a love relationship with God. Like earnestly wanting to know what He has planned for me even in the mundane (house chores mundane). Since doing this I start experiencing God in ways I never realized I had been experiencing Him in the past.

It’s been amazing!

But then the doer in me comes exploding out determined to do.

Do anything.

I reign her in, and God does something I never expected Him to do. He asks me to get involved where He’s at work. So I do. I obey, step out in faith, and adjust my life to what He’s doing.

Then, to draw me ever more closely to Him, He sets me smack dab in the middle of a waiting period.

I’m talking I was full force running and out of nowhere pops up a brick wall. Bringing me back to my place in my relationship with God.

(Now, some people are going to read this and become concerned with a young vibrate women not being able to have her own power. Well guess what folks I indeed do NOT have my own power. THANK YOU JESUS! Because of Jesus’ death and resurrection I don’t need my own power. My own power does nothing but take me to places I don’t need to be, to stay for longer than I need to stay, and participating in activities God never intended for my life, good or bad.)

So there I am my doer self no longer doing anymore (other than what I consider the mundane). That part of me literally feels like a caged animal. I can see what God possibly has in store for me, and I want it. But there is absolutely NOTHING I can do about it. Literally, I did what God called me to do, and now He has asked me to wait.

Which brings me back to where God wants me. Desperately seeking His face in an intimate, unique, all consuming love relationship with Him.

That’s all He actually cares about. This amazing relationship I get to experience with Him.

I can always do later.

 

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